CapCity Classic: Joseph O. Patton: How I survived nine minutes of Dick Cheney

Editor’s note: This article first appeared in the August 2002 edition of the Capital City Free Press in Patton’s column, “Off the record….”

Monday, July 22

3:07 pm:
  I tried to get out of it. Given that my employer, The Montgomery Independent, had published a lengthy prelude to this event last week, I don't see why I am baking in the mid-summer Alabama heat waiting for the man they call Dick Cheney. I've been told this man runs the great nation we live in but still only gets second billing for it. Poor guy.

  But my publisher insisted I vacate the comfy confines of our office and bounce over to one of the Capital City's certified gems, the Blount Cultural Park, which accommodates the Alabama Shakespeare Festival, the Montgomery Museum of Fine Arts, a cadre of temperamental swans, some Republican blood money and a few underage couples sucking face after dark.

  Cheney should be arriving at 5 pm, just in time for rush hour, to officially dedicate a new portion of the park. I'm assuming it's just another slow day at the White House.